October 2010
32 posts
A lot of people often ask me what my inspiration is for the content I post. To be honest, the majority of what I write about is based on past experiences and things that I’m currently going through. Most of the time I learn a lot through writing it out for the world and then looking back at what I was feeling at that very moment. It really means a lot to me when I read all of your feedback about how my words help you get through shit in life. It actually allows me to see that there are in fact ways of letting other people into your life to help you, which has always been one of my weakest qualities. I learn a lot from all of you, and your responses are a lot more appreciated than you’ll ever imagine. Like I’ve said before we’re all human, and as much as I hate to admit this, I don’t know all of the answers.
On a brighter note, I do actually have a more concrete way of pointing out a huge part of my inspiration. If you’re ever looking for another blog with a different take on life expressed through amazing visuals and words, then this is definitely for you:
Follow Ashlyn Whittington (http://ashlynwhittington.tumblr.com) on Tumblr, my partner in crime. And by partner I do mean girlfriend, and by crime, I do mean love.
Thoughts?
John Mayer - Edge of Desire
What do you think of this song?
I’ve recently been in a huge rethinking phase of a lot of things going on in my life and have been trying to understand the core of what’s been bothering me the most. After days of thinking, I’ve realized that a lot of my tormenting is due to what the Internet does to our generation on an emotional level. We’re all living in this new world where everyone’s connected, where it’s easy to meet people, where we absolutely need to know what’s going on in everyone else’s life, where words are used freely without hesitation, where every single thing that is said is completely open to personal interpretation, where thoughts don’t disappear, and most importantly where anyone can say whatever they want without any form of emotional attachment behind it. I could essentially go on your Tumblr right now, tell you that I hate you for absolutely no reason and continue with my life. The sad thing out of all of that is that you’d actually take it to a literal degree as it’d affect you like any other human being, and I would just go on living my life as if nothing had happened. The truth is we do care what people think and as much as no one likes to admit that, it is true. There isn’t a single person in this world who likes to hear that they’re hated. I mean, we already try so hard to build self-confidence in the first place, we really don’t need someone telling us that we’re doing anything wrong.
We let ourselves be affected by people who most of the time aren’t all that important to us and allow these emotions to take over our conscience. The worst part out of all of this is that it doesn’t actually exist. It just doesn’t fucking exist. You’re reading things on the Internet that would probably never even take place in reality. That one thing that’s making you down might not even be directed to you but you accidentally caught it on a page and now it’s killing you. Maybe that person’s tone was the complete opposite of what you interpreted, maybe the consequences of that statement were a result of something you’re not even aware of, or maybe it’s just something that you just subconsciously created for yourself that wasn’t even worth thinking about it in the first place. It happens to all of us but when it does, it’s just important to remember that there is no support, no actual emotion, and no absolutely no credibility behind it.
After thinking about all of this, I’ve come up with an idea that might help you too. For a week, starting today, I’m going on a social network detox of all platforms except for Tumblr. I’m deactivating my Facebook, not touching my Twitter or any other of the sites that make me cringe on a daily basis. The reason for keeping Tumblr is that I truly believe that it’s the future of intelligent social networking because of the fact that there is thought and reflection behind any post. You can’t be impulsive on Tumblr because if you are, your blog loses credibility and you fall of the face of this new earth that we live in. One week. If you decide to do it too, send me a message and I’ll be glad to listen to how it’s helping you. If you decide not to, just don’t forget that words only matter in a world where you can actually feel them.
Thoughts?
We tend to see ourselves as completely invincible and believe we can overcome any challenge that comes our way. Although independence is an extremely important quality to have, it’s equally important to step back once in a while and fully evaluate the weight of a situation and the impact it can have on your sanity. The truth is we hate having to go to others for help because it makes us feel like weaker leaders in our battle against life.
Life is like a piece of sandpaper, you can either choose to throw your “thug-fighter persona” on and live on the rougher side, or you can openly admit that the simpler solution might actually be more enjoyable and live on the softer end. Regardless of what you choose, it’s important to acknowledge the fact that at some point you will need a guiding hand. It’s in our nature to feel obliged to relate to something that can get us through our fears. We listen to music that matches our mood to live vicariously through our own stories. We watch piles of commercial love movies to maintain hope in positive reality. We read books by experts on subjects we want to learn more about. We follow idols and get inspired by their actions to create our own precedents for the people around us. We essentially live with the need of constant support, yet refuse to open up to others when we’re in need.
It’s always hard to officially admit to the fact that we’re experiencing weakness because our animal instincts pride in the opposite. The truth is, asking someone for help isn’t a sign of weakness in any way, but rather proof that you’re just not lying to yourself. Despite what some might claim, there is not a single person in this world that can get through life completely alone and still be happy and problem free. It’s not a question of strength or endurance, but a question of being human. If you’re like me and feel like you’re that one person that everyone always goes to for help then this next part is especially for you: we feel like leaders of a group that everyone relies on for any given problem and it’s an amazing feeling to be able to help others but most of the time we can’t even help ourselves. The reward of being a guide is irreplaceable but the fact of prioritizing issues in someone else’s reality hurts us more than we think.
I’ve realized that although we’re all leaders in our own way, a cry for help doesn’t make us weaker, but actually stronger. Our current strengths are due to past experiences and personal reflection, which in themselves come from seeking outside help and answers. It’s a hard band-aid to pull when you look in the mirror and tell yourself: “Fuck, I need advice”; but I assure you that the bark is a lot less scary than the bite itself. As much as we think we’re invincible, we’re really not. We might act as robots during necessary times, but at the end of the day, we feel the wounds as soon as our blood starts to cool down. It’s almost as if the world has turned us into binary creatures who act strong in the presence of others and weak during moments of solitude. As much as it’s difficult to admit, self-expression really is hard and it’s always easier to imagine our diatribes rather than practicing them. The next time you’re feeling shitty or need to let something out, just remember that you’re not the only one. We’re all fighting a battle, we all hate the fact of needing help, we all wish there was an easy solution to everything, we all want problems to fade away by themselves; but most importantly, we all need someone to talk to. So the next time this happens just pick up your phone, call that one person you’d love to be able to tell everything to, and just spill everything that you’re feeling. Life is too short to let stressful bullshit marinate in your mind, and letting it all out actually does solidify the borders of sanity.
Thoughts?